How To Talk To A Child About Death Before A Funeral


Funerals are difficult for people of all ages and stages of life, but they can be even more difficult for kids. Children may get scared and confused, especially if they were close to the person who has passed away. Be sure to thoroughly prepare your kids for the experience of going to their first funeral by following these steps.

Express Your Own Feelings

One of the ways that children understand that it's okay to show their emotions is seeing how openly and healthily you are able to express your own emotions. Talk about your feelings of sadness about the person who has passed away and show those feelings to your kids as best you can. If you feel the need to cry, that's okay. If you're angry, that's alright, too. By allowing yourself to express however you feel, you are validating those feelings, and that shows kids that it's alright to do the same.

Ask Mostly Open-Ended Questions

In order to gain a deeper understanding of how much knowledge your kids have about death and maybe even which mistaken perceptions they carry, you need to ask questions that empower them to open up about their thoughts, feelings, and beliefs. Try asking a child the following questions to see how you can best help them prepare for the funeral.

  • So I was thinking that we might go to the funeral. How do you feel about that?
  • What do you think should happen at a funeral?
  • What do you think people should never do at a funeral?
  • How are you going to react if you get sad at the funeral?
  • What is a good thing about funerals?
  • What are you confused about when it comes to funerals?

Prepare the Child for the Funeral Rituals

Talk to the child about the practical side about attending the funeral before you go as well. A child who is confused about the rituals of a funeral may get extremely upset or cause a commotion. After you ask a child what they already know about a funeral, correct any misconceptions and thoroughly explain each ritual that you know will be carried out at the funeral. Talk about tributes and why the funeral is so important.

Finally, keep in mind that your kids are going to be able to handle your honesty much easier than they would cope if you try to deceive them into thinking that a funeral is a more comfortable thing than it is. Have a few conversations with your child before bringing them to a funeral. If you aren't sure if your child is ready for the heaviness that comes with a funeral, get a babysitter. Otherwise, guide your child through the process with an open heart and mind.

For more information, contact professionals like Memorial Mortuaries.


14 July 2016

Writing an Obituary: Do's and Don'ts

Following the death of my grandfather, I found myself in the awkward position of having to write the obituary. I wanted to capture the spirit of him and list everything he was proud of in his life, including his family and work accomplishments. However, at the same time, I knew that I had a limited amount of space to work with. After spending hours researching obituaries, I finally felt confident in my skills and proceeded to write my grandfather's. In my opinion, it was perfect. Writing an obituary while you are grieving your loss is challenging, but I hope that my website helps you write one for your loved one that helps capture who they were as a person.